med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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