Your face is a jimmy john
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Why can't burritos get me drunk
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
