i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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