she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
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This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
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Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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