i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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