the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize