Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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