I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
he shaved USA in his pubs
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
