Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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