new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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