Jerry, you need to find god
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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