I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
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Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
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I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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