I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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