The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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