Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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