I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
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