Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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