hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
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