Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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