Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
