Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
