Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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