Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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