So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize