I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
