She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
