i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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