It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize