I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
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And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
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It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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