If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
