I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
