Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight http://tfl.nu/79dr
  Replies (1) Good night (670) Bad night (1835)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning. http://tfl.nu/ul21
  Replies (7) Good night (2332) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work http://tfl.nu/0keb
  Replies (20) Good night (5183) Bad night (1261)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself... http://tfl.nu/71kr
  Replies (35) Good night (1687) Bad night (6662)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  protesters in toronto definately have the best pot

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): protesters in toronto definately have the best pot http://tfl.nu/s38f
  Replies (17) Good night (4686) Bad night (1136)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  God gave him joint rollers for hands

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): God gave him joint rollers for hands http://tfl.nu/1evx
  Replies (10) Good night (3178) Bad night (1055)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  he tried to breastfeed my turtle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): he tried to breastfeed my turtle http://tfl.nu/mp5f
  Replies (16) Good night (1695) Bad night (2805)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him. http://tfl.nu/ieqp
  Replies (15) Good night (3715) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier http://tfl.nu/54o9
  Replies (5) Good night (2521) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table' http://tfl.nu/avs4
  Replies (4) Good night (3780) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end??? http://tfl.nu/eolj
  Replies (4) Good night (1608) Bad night (639)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob. http://tfl.nu/r18w
  Replies (5) Good night (1608) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week. http://tfl.nu/bh6r
  Replies (4) Good night (904) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it. http://tfl.nu/8sjw
  Replies (7) Good night (1432) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me http://tfl.nu/upe9
  Replies (4) Good night (688) Bad night (304)

Randomize