I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I am never drinking with the goths again.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize