Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
