Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
