Your tits are I can't wait for
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize