i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
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Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
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When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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