Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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