a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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