Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
