Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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