Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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