it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
