Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
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He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
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I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
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