google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
