Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
