so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
