OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize