Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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