Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
