Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
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